Sober Seto
by PolandSpringz
Summary: A short fic for BottomLeftSeto in which Seto is forced to witness the rest of the Dan drunk.


The sunlight beamed against his face as he stopped for a moment and looked upward, wiping sweat from his forehead. The sky was a mixture of different bluish hues with a perfect pale yellow spot blurring the colors together. The man leaned forward slightly, laying his crossed arms on the stack of boxes. The day had just begun not too long ago, and the temperature had already crossed into the high eighties. This summer certainly was shaping up to be quite a hot one, and Seto wondered what had happened to that late cold winter air that had blown its way into the spring months. The man glanced down at the pile and sighed. He had six more deliveries until he could take a break. He felt a sudden buzzing at glanced down at his pocket of his green jumpsuit. He had tied the top part around his waist so he wouldn't have to worry about heat stroke or anything. He left one hand on the pile of boxes while the other flipped his cell phone open to read the recent text.

From: Kido

To: Seto

Subject: …

So, you might want to come home right after you're done because, I don't think I can handle these idiots on my own anymore.

Seto closed his phone quickly and shoved it back into his pocket before chuckling to himself quietly.

"Oh Danchou…You can't really handle anyone on your own can you?"

The black-haired man had finished his deliveries and more without taking his desperately needed break so he could get home sooner. Surprisingly, in doing so, he had received a larger pay for his errands than expected, so he believed there was some to him skipping his usual break. He arrived at the Dan's meeting place and placed his hand on the doorknob, bracing himself for any possible situation. As the door opened, the man dodged a coffee table that had flown to his left. When he regained his composure from the sudden attack he looked into the house.

Hibiya was rocking in the corner in the far right behind the couch mumbling some sort of chant; Konoha had a mouthful of negima and chosen to run around in circles throughout the house; Mary was passed out next to the couch where the coffee table had once resided: Momo had some sort of sharp object in her hand and was holding it up to her face like a microphone as she sang in an incoherent language in front of Hibiya. Seto could scarcely make out the muffled sloppy "believe in yourselves" that rolled out of her mouth as she spun around and pointed the kitchen knife at Hibiya as though he was supposed to say something back. Then there was Shintarou, who was passed out on the floor to what Seto presumed to have been the kitchen (for it was now decorated in different colors of spray paint) holding a broken bottle in his hand where his phone should have been. From what Seto could discern, the old cell phone had been launched from the man's hand when he slipped in the brown liquid that was on the spilt on the ground and crashed through the window(for he had seen it when he was walking to the house). What lay in front of Seto however, was a completely different matter entirely.

Kano, was tied up with rope, and was squirming in front of Seto with a devilish grin. _He looks like a caterpillar,_ Seto thought to himself as he stared down at the creature as it did its strange dance ritual of wriggling back and forth in front of him. In a slurred voice, the blonde creature spoke to him.

"Awwhhhh…Setow!...Setow, Setow, Setow…! Kidow isw iwn tha bawk…" The words he tried to say at the beginning where incoherent and came out as a long choppy mumble but Seto was sure he didn't want to know what he had actually said. He stepped over the creature and made his way to the back of the house, outside, where he found Kido digging a large hole.

"Kido? What are you doing?!" He asked quickly in a concerned tone. He was talking to the girl's back but he had noticed the size of the hole. "Look, I may not know all the details but don't throw Kano in there!" He said as he touched the girl on the shoulder, causing her to look back at him. He removed his hand abruptly when he received a deadly glare and then he noticed the faint blush on her cheeks.

_Oh great, even danchou's drunk! _Seto thought silently as he backed away from the girl. The first time we got her drunk, we had thought it would make her act nicer, too bad we found out it increased her rage towards Kano. She suddenly dropped the shovel and bolted towards the house. I watched with horror as Kano was carried above her head and then chucked into the ditch. She grabbed the shovel and began to bury him when in a fit of rage.

I snuck back into the house quietly only to find the situation had worsened. Shintarou was running through the house breaking everything that came in his way while carrying Konoha who was now deemed as the King of Triceratops and Negima. Momo held to butcher knives and was swinging them in front of the just awoken Medusa girl and laughing. Hibiya was attempting to crawl through the broken window and escape this horrible scene but he was too short to reach it. I stood in the middle of the room watching my friends try to kill each other.

And that was when I grabbed Hibiya, and ran out the door of the house.


End file.
